Similar to my positive meeting with Carl, I had a great dinner with Gary Carter, where amongst a broad, fascinating conversation, we hit upon the notion of mastery, and whether we can truly master something. This has always been something that I don't necessarily believe or feel compelled to achieve. But Gary speaks so convincingly of his desire to master certain elements within his life. When he asks me what I think of my own films, I say that I am serving my apprenticeship - convinced that these experiences will inform an eventual mastery of a subject. I point out Boorman, Scorcese, Loach, all in the sunset of the lives, still making films because they want to. This isn't a job, it is a way of life.
When we discuss the marathons I ran without training, Gary asks me "what would you be like if you trained?". I don't have an answer for it, but it neatly mirrors another element of our conversation. If I was directing and producing for television when I was 22, what I be like with training?
I leave the dinner almost convinced that I want to return to the industry and put myself to the test once again, but it would mean relinquishing the creative freedom that I enjoy in Staffordshire. Food for thought perhaps.
Wednesday, 8 July 2009
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